My past life

My child is only 2 years old. Yet I find myself having a hard time remembering what life was like before he was born, even though it wasn't really that long ago. I vaguely remember having free time--I'm not sure what I did with all that time, though. Took it for granted, that's for sure. I remember going out......to restaurants, bars, movies, going out shopping on the spur of the moment without making sure my husband was available to stay home with our son.....or worrying about dragging the kid along with me. I also remember getting a good night's sleep.......in which I would get 8 hours straight without being awakened by calls of "mama! mama!" or crying because a pacifier has fallen to the floor. I remember sleeping in--ah, what a luxury that was. Now 7 a.m. is what I consider "sleeping in." And if, on the off chance I do have the opportunity to sleep until say, 9 or 9:30, I feel like I've wasted part of the day.

All of these things--they seem so distant. And some days I do miss those days. But not really. All of that has led to this point in my life.......me sitting here at my computer, a baby monitor on the desk from which I can hear the peacful sound of my son softly breathing as he sleeps. Sure, we don't go out much any more. And yes, I'm up most every morning by 6:30.....some mornings before 6......and yes, he still wakes me up at night--a lot. But before he was born--in that past life--I never got the hugs and kisses, I never got to hear his beautiful and contagious belly laugh, I never got to hear him say "wuv uu, mama!" (translation: I love you, mama), never had the joy of watching him grow and learn and change every day. All of that stuff I used to be able to do before he was born--all of that pales in comparison.